Aug 10, 2007

Ohh, that's the spot!

So a friend was recently telling me a little story about a physio session that turned into something else all together. Seems that a little inner thigh rub got upgraded to a full chow down on the cha-cha.

It got me thinking. Actually it got me hard which then got me thinking...

Earlier tonight I was wandering around the local shopping centre with the image in my head of her lying back on the massage table with one of those little towels that really are more like spunk rags than anything useful for covering your modesty. It was no wonder things got out of hand, she is a babe.

Anyhow, I have a big weekend of physical activity ahead of me and my back had given a little twinge today. The more I thought about her massage with a happy ending the more I figured I should at least get my back seen to, after all, if it could happen to her why not me?

I first found one of those little bunch of Asian masseuse dudes that set up in the middle of the shopping centre. While being watched does not worry me, I figured the chance of a random upgrade in service was not likely to happen while the general public wandered about doing their shopping. There was also the small issue that they were all dudes. Really not my thing.

A little further on I found what I was looking for. A massage shop! Inner health, physical healing, acupuncture. By now my back was screaming for some loving and the cute girl at the counter had me hooked. $30 for half an hour of back and neck massage - fantastic! Hope she has strong hands to go with those eyes.

With demure little smile she led me off to a suitably dark room with massage table, oils and bottles of crazy Chinese herbs. Even one of those little towels. Looking good.

Next thing I know a little old man who looks like some wise old kung foo master appears in her place. He gives me a funny look and I instantly guess that it was his daughter who showed me into the room. My look of disappointment obviously betrays me. He returns a look that simply says "Your fucked for even thinking it mate!"

I lie down and prepare to meet my maker. The little fucker has fingers of steel and a grip strength that could squash a golf ball. I can feel the tendons in my back being lifted from the bone, every muscle fibre is individually separated and re-aligned, in some cases it feels like he is reconfiguring the whole lot in an effort to out do evolution. My arms get twisted so far around my body that I am convinced I will leave looking like bloody pretzel.

The creaks and groans are truly alarming but I am not going to scream or tap out. I will not submit!

In terror I have forgotten all the naughty thoughts that were there while making the booking.

With that odd slapping thing they do with the cupped hands ringing out like thunder I know that it is nearly over. I have survived. I just hope I can still walk.

It all goes quiet and his face appears beside mine with a wry little grin as he asks if it was strong enough? Yeah tops, good job mate, lets see if I can stand?.

I slide off the table and stand up, so far so good. A little ginger lean and twist and bugger me if I don't feel about 6 inches taller without a single twinge to be felt in my back.

He smiles at me again knowingly - you come back some time?

Hell yeah!

Full service?

Whooha, hang on WTF is full service...


Kitty said...

Can you please email me the name and address of that physio your friend frequents - smashing.

You know Joshie, an old boyfriend from when I lived in LA was a participant in Ultimate Fighting Championship (before it pussied out and went mainstrean) and trained with the Gracie family (Brasilian Jui Jits). He taught me a few moves of the self-defending variety as LA can be a bit scary. I got really good, so good in fact, that I got him to tap out once. He was 6' 5 and weighed gee, 260? Big boy. The point is - I can help you! Again!

After we're done cock painting, I can give you a massage while simultaneously popping a can of whupass (graciously donated by The Captain) and make you feel sensations that your little Chinese man could only deam of...

Sexy time.

Josh said...

Kitty, I need all the help I can get so thanks again. Contact details for her Physio are in a private email.

The massage sounds good, just make sure the whupass is in date and is not the girlie one. I like it hard.

Kitty said...


We have SO MUCH in common.

I have to tolerate playgroup this morning (no hot birds to perv on) but when I get home I'm going to fire off a really dirty email to you.

Prepare for wood.

unique_stephen said...

I can only imagine... kitty - make sure you make him spank that monkey.

Josh - are you in Sydney or Melbourne or what. I like the sound of this guy. Is there an inverse relationship between the hight you gained and the wood you lost?

Josh said...

Kitty, Waiting.....

Unique Stephen, Sydney these days but hate to break it to you dude, chicks only need apply...

I suppose if you say 3 inches left after I lost wood + 6 inches of height gained it about equals out...

Cute family on your blog. Everyone has kids but me :(

Kitty said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Josh said...

Kitty, everyone says that but you still lov'em don't you..

Sorry, not taking the bait on where I may or may not live....not publicly anyhow.

unique_stephen said...

shucks, thanks.
They're for rent if you like (more for the wife).

knifepainter said...

I'd be wary of the full sevice.

(Voice of British reserve).


When are you going to give us a pic Josh?

phishez_rule said...

I want a physio like that. Any service for my special bits would be muchly appreciated right now.

I've seen poses like in the pic in some pretty hardcore porn. Though, with significantly less clothing.

Would you really want such a hard service to your most sensitive areas. No matter how good it felt at the end...

Miss Smack said...

Where is this place in SYDNEY!???

What suburb and how much was it?

Josh said...

Unique Stephen, I've heard of rent a hubby but wife and kids. Lets talk $$$$

Knifepainter, warning noted.

Ubermouth, who says my picture is not on penis secret already and waiting for comments...

Pishez, not really into hard service on the sensitive bits, but hard massage is good.

Gentle service to sensitive bits is a hobby of mine, mail me some time.

Miss Smack, Sorry, the photo is descriptive only, the actual shop was more generic and in a boring old Westfield.

Cost was $30 for half an hour, value was priceless - it got me through the weekend!