Apr 29, 2008


As I crash onwards through this life my moral compass seems to have left me drifting in a sea of temptation and complications.

With a smile and a flick of the eyes she said there was a line. She was not sure where the line was but we would know when we got to it.

The story was the same as I have heard so often of late. He ignores me, I need more, I am as horny as all hell but he is always tired. The list of complaints went on. What is wrong with these men? Service your bloody women or cut them loose.

In my world, like anyone else's there are many links between people. Shagging the girlfriend of an acquaintance has consequences for all involved. I know this all to well having been on the wrong end of that stick before.

Yet here I am. The alarm bells the quietest they have ever been, washed out by the blood pumping in my ears at the thought of what is about to happen.

We talk about it. Probably for too long but long enough to know the deal.

My position is that I have nothing to offer afterwards. We will not and can never be partners, the drama it would generate in our community is mind blowing. If this happens, if we seek out that magical line then it is for now and to quench a thirst we share.

Her position is different. She thinks she wants more. To be out of her relationship and to start one with me.

I re-enforce my position and stand my ground. I want to be clear, open and honest. That will not happen.

We kiss and explore each other. It feels like it should and the world fades into the background. The consequences forgotten and lost between fresh hotel sheets.

There is no real guilt for me and that is the only thing that scares me. I used to be different and I don't know what has changed.

Apr 11, 2008

Box watching

With all the stuff I am out and about doing it takes a good show to get me to sit down and watch TV.

Recently I got a tip off from a mate. It went something like this.

"It is a western with lots of swearing, but it is so well made and hard to describe...just trust me ok?"

Now normally I expect this person to a be a little more articulate so I took the offered season one DVD's of Deadwood from him and despite the less than inspiring synopsis I gave it a whirl.

I now know why he was recommending it and why he struggled to capture the essence of the show in 20 words or less.

Firstly, there is a hell of a lot if swearing - IMDB comments that Fuck is used over 2980 times in the 36 episodes. That is a spectacular average of one F bomb being dropped every 43 seconds of the show. Cocksucker also gets a beating along with a multitude of variations and permutation of snatch, cunt and pussy.

With that in mind you wonder how easy it would be to sit through - after all it makes Eddie Murphy in Delirious or Raw look like Bill Cosby kissing babies.

The answer is that it fits the characters and the scenario perfectly. While I am guessing the language is not period correct, it just works and in no time you will be calling co-workers cocksucker and cunt and wondering why they are staring at you.

The good news is that there is also a story with most of the characters drawn from real life and the whole thing loosely planted in actual history . Calamity Jane, Wild Bill Hickok are probably two well know names from the wild west but the real meat in this show lies with Al Swearengen. He is charismatic, rough, rude and ruthless - everything a bar and brothel owner should be.

A classic quote from Al after a family were murdered and robbed; "God rest the souls of that poor family... and pussy's half price for the next 15 minutes."

The story is well layered with great character development and lots of people to love and hate. Despite the obvious traps and stereo types the genre would be exposed to, it manages to walk a line rarely trodden in this sort of show and avoids telling you who is the good guy and who is the bad.

So, track it down and allocate some time, it is well worth the viewing and after the first season I am already disappointed that it only did three seasons and 36 episodes in total.

Seen it? Let me know what you thought.

Oh, and I just found this on Youtube - Fucking brilliant!

Apr 10, 2008

What pisses me off.

OK, time for a mini rant.

First of all if you really want to easily offend, upset or risk someone looking everywhere else to buy stuff rather than deal with you then do the following;

Today a rep turned up at my office to press the flesh, make sure we were happy with the service, show us some new products blah, blah, blah.

I realise that this is what they do but seriously, he had nothing new product wise to show, no nice pens or calendars for me and basically wasted a good fifteen minutes of my long, long day to say stuff all.

Just when I thought it could get no worse and just as he is finally leaving he kicks in with the kids question.

"So when are you going to get serious and have some kids? Surprised your parents are'nt onto you by now for that grandchild!" he grinned. "No sooner did I get the first one out, than my folks were asking for the second..."

I was stunned. How fucking presumptuous. Now maybe I was having a bad day, but to me and to a whole lot of other folks, these sort of comments can cut deep.

I also loved the way his shoulders went back and the chest puffed up that little bit when he said "No sooner did I get the first one out.." like he actually gave birth to it. Twat.

It takes a fair bit to rattle me, but I closed the door to my office after showing it to him with a forced smile and damn near punched the wall I was that pissed off.

Seriously, if someone does not have kids and has not raised the subject personally, show some tact and presume that they either have chosen not to or worst still, can't. Either way it is none of your fucking business!

There is enough shit at work without strangers reminding you of the top item on your to-do list that you have not been able to recruit the right staff for. My boys are swimming, the dude all works and I will have kids one day but until then, next subject.

Secondly, how do the police force expect respect when they carry on like this;

I have a short trip to work. When I am feeling excited or awake I even ride a bike. The section of road I have to travel is frequented by police eager to bust people for speeding and as such, at least in this area, I don't.

Now I don't think it is unreasonable that cops, unless on the way to save a life, obey the speed limit. Speeding to go find someone speeding is not in my opinion necessary, safe or how the game should be played.

In the past week though, I have seen highway patrol cars tailgating, doing illegal U turns and weaving in and out of traffic so they could get their shitty little radar gun onto some dude doing 5km/h over the limit. The irony being that the cops were doing a good 20km/h more than the guy they were busting.

I had one cop filling my mirrors as I sat in the left lane, cruise control pegged on 60. The right lane was clear but oh no, he crept up to my bumper then slid back before creeping up again and then backing off.

This went on for a good couple of kilometres before he pulled out around me, zoomed off at about 100km/h in the 60 zone and over the horizon on some urgent mission.

You know what he was in a hurry for? Yep, he was waiting just over the crest of a hill, checking my speed as I slid on by, still on cruise control and at the speed limit. Twat.

Now, that really wound me up. They wonder why people don't respect them when they do shit like that.

So that is it, other than the fact it is 2am, I have to get out of bed for work in about 4 hours and no amount of redtube.com is going get me to sleep, life is good.